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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Blah, Blah, Blogging... 6 weeks post-op

OK so here's the real deal... I haven't blogged in 2 weeks because I haven't lost a single, solitary pound... in fact, I've GAINED 3 pounds... and I've been too bummed/discouraged/embarrassed to tell you. But there! I did it! Now I have to be accountable for myself, because you all know my dirty little secret.
I lost 30 lbs in the first 30 days. And then it just stopped. I know it's partially because I can eat "real" food now... meat, cheese, etc... and I have yet to really exercise.
To lose my pre-op weight, I walked 1-4 miles a day. This week, I've walked about 1/2 - 3/4 of a mile 3 different times, and I've done 2 short workouts on the easy-rider thing. Not enough!!! I was supposed to get to buy a treadmill last month, but other expenses came up... such is life. I haven't been to the gym since well before surgery. And now that I'm back to work and it's hot out, I'm just so stinking tired... not a good enough excuse, but the truth nonetheless. By the time I get home from work, feed and water the dogs, water the plants, make and eat dinner, get everything ready for the following day... leaving the house is my last idea of fun. I usually get a second wind around 9...Then I'd have to change, drive to the gym, workout, drive back, shower, change again... I know, I sound royally lazy right now. Just being honest. Plus, I need to go to bed around 10. See how it just doesn't seem to fit in? Don't even suggest going in the morning before work... I know myself all too well for that delusion. If I had a treadmill in the next room, however, so what if it's 9 pm? Hop on for 30-60 minutes while I watch tv. Boom. Yeah, I totally need to win the lottery and create a home gym. Too bad I don't play the lottery.
Time for another secret: Truth is, yes, I'm still hungry all the time. Even though my stomach is only 2 oz and I'm supposed to eat only 1/4 cup of food 3-4 times a day, I feel like I can easily eat half a cup before I'm full. Is it my imagination? Probably. I mean they removed the art of the stomach which produces ghrelin, the hunger hormone. Only my brain and my tongue are hungry. Not my stomach.
I had acid reflux before surgery, and was warned that it could get worse. but, my surgeon repaired my small hiatal hernia, and he expected that would stop it. Hardly. I have a burning lump in my throat after every meal. Now I'm on some craptacular tasting liquid junk for ulcers... but it coats the stomach and we're trying it for my reflux. It's tid (that's 3 times a day for my non-medical friends). And that's on TOP of my bid (twice daily) Prilosec. And I still have zantac for break-through burning. And Tums in my purse at all times. GERD (Gastric Esophageal Reflux Disease) is no joke, friends! One time, it was so terrible, I actually had to sleep sitting up.
My main lesson learned since surgery has been this week. Do not trust the Sbux baristas regarding sugar content! I was assured by several of them that the Vanilla Rooibos tea and the Chai tea are sugar-free. LIES! There is no sugar added, but upon reading the nutrition facts on their website, they are indeed chock full of sugar. And here I was, sipping away. Maybe THAT's why I'm not losing. * le sigh * I should sue. Kidding. Maybe.
Oh, and now the much-coveted seasonal pumpkin spice latte is available for the year. Which means the caramel brulee latte, et al aren't far behind. And I can't have coffee or sugar. GRRRR.
The diet Snapple is ok. I actually have to add a packet of Splenda to make it palatable.
Sugar free popsicles have saved my life! Yummy.
My typical meals include the following (one at a time, of course, and all low-fat): 2 bites of cheddar cheese wrapped in thin roast beef; 2 bites of mozzerella cheese wrapped in thin turkey; a couple of bites of plain baked chicken, sometimes dipped in hummus; a couple of bites of yogurt or cottage cheese; chili beans (turkey or beef) with cheese. I got super tired of eggs and protein shakes when they were all I could have, so I haven't had either in several weeks. I bought some frozen salmon yesterday, which I can't wait to cook up! Hmmm, I nned to find some sugar-free teriyaki sauce... surely it exists out there somewhere? Come payday, I have to go to the Whole Foods market... probably a better chance of finding it there than Winco (idk if winco is a local thing... for you out-of-state-and-country-ers, it's like the Wal-Mart of grocery stores, lol... cheap kinda dirty people running around, gotta bag your own crap...) I've found Fresh & Easy to be a great resource, and it's super-close to home.
The surgeon thinks I'll be losing about 15 lbs/month now. That means that by the end of October, I should be about 100 pounds lower than I started! I'm excited at the prospect of getting a cute Halloween costume ffrom a store, rather than putting together my own due to the very limited and very expensive "plus-size" selection. My 2 best girlfriends and I are going to have some kind of theme this year... we have a few ideas... I'm also anxious to see how my weight loss improves my Disneyland experience in October! I should be able to share a 2-seater with my husband, instead of us each taking a different car. I can't wait to see how much energy I'll have by then! Right now, I still get slightly fatigued at times... my body is adjusted to a serious change. But doc said I'll be jumping around with energy by then! And then Christmas will be right around the corner... our first Christmas in our house! I won't be too self-conscious to take the pic I want to take for our Christmas cards... myself, the hubs, and the dogs on the front porch of our very own home :) I hope I'll be able to have a few sips of Soy eggnog by then! *drool*
OK, time for the "deep" junk...
This is where I REALLY need input from my fellow WLSers... VSG or otherwise. While 90% of comments are positive, and it feels great to be told I look amazing, there are a couple of things that really irk my turtle. The first one is frustrating: everyone who says "hey skinny!", etc. I'm certainly NOT skinny. I fully understand that these people are trying to compliment me and acknowledge my progress, however, while I may have lost 70 pounds, I am FAR from skinny. In fact I have to lose another 100 lbs just to not be considered obese. Idk why, but it gets my blood boiling. The second one is really hurtful. A handful of times, I've been told the following: "I heard about your surgery! When do you expect to start seeing results?" Again, I know they're not trying to be mean, but really? It makes me think, "I'm SO freaking fat that you can't notice that I've lost SEVENTY pounds?!" This from people who see me anywhere from weekly to monthly. Hello, notice I have 2 chins now instead of 5? LOL My general reply is a quiet and nervous, "Um, I've lost 70 so far... 40 before surgery and 30 after"... and then the kicker is their response. It's never apologetic, it's always, "oh really?!" like that don't believe me. It probably happens about once a week or so. Last week, it happened twice in one day at work, and I burst into tears as soon as she left the room. Now THAT was discouraging.
On a brighter note, I've gone down the following clothing sizes: Tops from 26/28 to 18/20; pants from 24 to 20; MEN, STOP READING HERE! Skip to the next paragraph! LOL and bra from 44DDD to 40DD. You know what's annoying? Adjusting my belt every time I move. If I sit, I have to loosen it, and if I stand, I have to tighten it. If I'm walking, I have to tighten it even more. I'm CONSTANTLY playing with my belt. Real cute.
My incisions look fantastic! I've seen pix of some other peoples' battle scars, and I'm SO pleased with my surgeon. The biggest scar, where my stomach was actually pulled out, is INSIDE my belly button, and under 1/2 an inch long. I have a friend whose is above her belly button, and over an inch long. Yikes! My other 4 are all under 1/4 inch. The surgeon said he specifically cuts on the existing strecth marks so that eventually, there won't be any visible scars (because they'll blend in with the existing scarring).
OK, my fingers are getting tired, and you probably gave up on reading half an hour ago! If you're still here, congratulations! Sound off below :)